We grow up always wanting a second chance. From early childhood playing a game and losing we immediately call DO OVER so we can save face and prove we can win. We have cried do over for the sake of shoving a victory in someones face to save our own. We cry do over to make ourselves feel good enough and worthy of whatever it is we might be doing. How many times as a child do we all remember these scenarios?
As adults we move from the do over phase and move onto more self righteous phase of saving our dignity that we now call second chances. Second chances generally turn into third and fourth and so on. Nothing wrong with a second chance as long as that is what it is. After so many tries you have to wonder if the wrongs are apart of us. Are the wrongs unchangeable or are they deep rooted character issues.
Generally speaking we have simple mistakes that we can correct or make better. Several months ago at work I realized a mistake I had made several months prior but had just realized. It was my first time working this particular deal and with every situation they are all dealt with so differently so it takes a while to get it down right. I was fairly new, learning as I went and at the time did not have a direct supervisor to help point out certain things. Regardless I screwed up. When I realized the mistake over six months later and I felt nearly sick over it. I worried for two days. My boss was not upset, my client was not upset and even defended me in the matter. To them it was okay, to me I failed. Basically, we made the situation right and all was fine. It is now approaching that time of year soon and a new deal will have to be made. Since this mistake I have post it notes reminding me what to do, marks on calender and a note in file. My goal....don't screw it up again! Clearly this was a mistake on my part, but not one I want to make again. Being conscious of that is first and foremost priority so I do it right next time. This is a healthy do over or second chance, whatever you want to call it. It is learning from a past mistake and keeping it in the front of my mind.
Other mistakes are not so easy to correct. Asking for a second chance and making some situations better is or feels like nearly impossible at times. Lets take relationships for example. Simple mishaps will happen, forgetting to take out the trash, not changing the toilet seat after being asked multiple times or whatever. Those are minor frustrations, small in the grand scheme of things. What about the big stuff though? What happens when you have failed miserably and caused a destruction of hurt along the way. Those type of second chances are not as easy to repair.
Look at the difference in people who get divorced or end a bad relationship. Some of us become hard and numb to certain things. We become less tolerant of people in general. We also in fact generally realize that all that obsessing and complaining was useless and small in the grand scheme of things and wonder why we made everything a big deal. Some of us in fact make significant changes to not be "that person" anymore. We still fail in other areas, but anything that reminds us of our old selves and the painful memories we try to do anything not to be that person ever again.
Others have a tendency to cling to others during that time of moving on. They fill every second to not be alone, to not be caught up in the silence, to not face the deep rooted issues that hide beneath the surface. Their idea of making a wrong right is a chance at a second chance. They look for that second chance and they try to make everything that one thing that makes them feel they are doing right. Basically so they can feel better about themselves.
Now is one better than the other? Is it better to become hard and keep people at a distance or better to embrace being surrounded by others to prove we can do a better job. That probably depends on which side of this you might fall.
Here is the ultimate factor. Do overs, second chances or redemption? Now redemption is a new way of saying it. Dictionary definition is the act of redeeming or atoning for a fault or mistake, or the state of being redeemed and or deliverance; rescue. What does the Bible say about redemption? Redemption is the act of buying something back, or paying a price to return something to your possession. Buying something back? Okay so that means to gain self dignity some of us harden ourselves to people or some overly embrace others.. We buy our dignity by making ourselves hard or others buy it with being too soft. When you take the Bible out of it, either of these could be unhealthy. If you do anything though with Jesus in your heart He can redeem you. The point is to everything we do is to do it with our Lord and Savior.
Jesus Christ redeemed us through his sacrifice of death, he purchased us from sin. We can cry out for do overs or second chances, but we already have that opportunity. Through Christ we are free of bondage, we are free of trying to prove something to others and ourselves. So scratch the idea of do overs and hold fast to the gift of grace, Jesus.
Romans 3:23-24
…for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus
